You would think after having someone in your life for six and a half years that can explain that planes are totally safe and functional, you would be able to get over your irrational fear of flying.

Truth be told, I just can’t do it.

Since I started using our flight benefits last year, I’ve been able to come up with a few things that let me deal with flying. Either way, this doesn’t mean the day will come when I love it and that its not an anxiety inducing event. Hopefully these tips can help you fly a little easier.

Tip 1: Arrive Early

Airports can be congested, anxiety inducing places. There are lots of people all on a mission to get on their flights, which can hold you up in a number of ways. The ticket counter and check-in baggage lines can go on forever. Someone can get pulled going though security, slowing down the process. The terminal can be long, which can make it harder to get to the gate. For someone with anxiety, all of these factors have crossed my mind at least once. To counteract this, we try to get to the airport 2-2.5 hours early, as recommended by TSA. This gives me plenty of time to adjust to my busy surroundings and make it through security in a reasonable amount of time.

Tip 2: Explore the Airport

I originally got this idea from the Savvy Psychologist podcast before we went to Dallas last year. One of the ways she recommends combating flying anxiety is to immerse yourself in all things airport related. This can be going to the airport to pick up and drop off your loved ones (as I have done many times). It can also be going around all the terminals you have access to in order to check out all of the shopping and food options. The most important suggestion that I use is to sit and watch the airplanes. Once you see tens to hundreds of planes landing and taking off again, it makes the prospect of being on the plane a little less scary. If these people end up fine, I most likely will too.

Tip 3: Buying Your Seat Could Lower Your Stress

Since we nonrev on the regular, this is not an option that is readily available to me. However, after waiting to get on the plane up to 5 minutes before the door closes, I can imagine how much less anxious I would feel if I knew when I was getting on and where I was going. There is a designated boarding time and I would not be trying to cram myself and my stuff onto a fully loaded plane, which would make for a smoother experience.

Tip 4: Bring A Travel Buddy

Since I am still not ready to travel by myself, Don is my permanent travel buddy. I find it helps to have someone to talk to while waiting for the flight and being on the airplane. If you aren’t able to bring a friend, you may have luck talking to the person next to you. Who knows, you may meet someone interesting!

Tip 5: Meditate

Meditation and mindfulness practices have played a huge role in lowering my anxiety. I would recommend trying it out at least a month before you fly, that way you have developed the tools to effectively use the exercises in advance. When I’m looking for more guidance for my meditation practice, I use the Insight Timer or Headspace apps (Note: Headspace does require a subscription after the first 10 sessions). For me, focusing on my breathing during takeoff helps with my initial anxiety and eases me into the relaxation that I try to have in the air.

Tip 6: Bring Your Favorite Entertainment

When all else fails, being distracted is better than sitting idly with worry. When we travel, I bring my Kindle and Ipad so I have options for spending my time. A lot of streaming apps offer the option to download your favorite movies and shows, which is a great feature to take advantage of. For my kindle, I often take advantage of my library’s ebooks to pass the time.

Tip 7: Get Some Water

Drinking water is always beneficial. In this case, it is better to have water than caffeinated drinks, since they will only increase the jittery feelings. If I’m really anxious, I use water as part of my mindfulness practice as well. I focus solely on taking the drink of water, which can help settle and refocus my mind.

Tip 8: Think About Your Arrival

One of the ways I make it through the flight is by thinking about all of the fun things I’m going to do once I get on the ground. For example, when we go to Florida, I think about the fun activities that we are going to do with my family. I remember that some of my favorite parks, food, and shopping are all waiting for me when we land. This helps me be more excited and happy, instead of nervous and upset.

Tip 9: Enjoy Your Vacation

This is self explanatory, but sometimes it is really easy to get caught up in the worried thoughts that plague our mind. Before I received help for my anxiety, I used to panic about how much time would pass before I would have to go through the whole flying process again. Now that I’m more mindful of my time, I focus more on what I’m doing each day and the fun times I’m going to have.

Tip 10: Repeat!

As scary as it sounds, the more you fly, the better off you will be. It will make the whole experience less nerve racking. I don’t foresee that we will be able to do this in the coming months, but recently, we have been flying somewhere every 1-2 months. The repetition helps me because I have less time in between to worry about what could possibly go wrong with the next flight. It has gotten me more adjusted to the whole flying process, which has made my more recent experiences much better.

To conclude: If you having issues with anxiety or any other mental health issue, I highly encourage that you seek out help. Your primary care physician and/or insurance company can lead you to therapists and other resources that can help you. If it is easier for you, there are several helplines that you can reach out to:

National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) Helpline: 1-800-950-NAMI (6264)

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) Helpline: 1-800-662-HELP (4357)